discipline
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“One day I won’t see the sky anymore”
📓 May 16, 2026 — 7:54 a.m. Saturday morning. I should be leaving soon to go sell plastic and paper bags. The daily grind. Simba’s at the window. Coffee brewing. And I keep thinking about something that happened yesterday. I was sitting in my van parked outside. Eating Pollo Loco. And everything felt… normal. Blue… Continue reading
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“I thought this movie would suck”
📓 May 15, 2026 — 9:20 a.m. Went for a long-ass drive last night. Got home around 3 in the morning. Sometimes when I’m stressed… I just drive. Simba’s in the window passed out. Vacuum in front of me. Jeremy Corbell on YouTube talking about aliens. Movie I expected to hate but ended up loving?… Continue reading
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“I think I’m finally starting to respect myself”
I thought procrastination meant laziness. Now I think it was exhaustion, discouragement, and feeling like nothing I did was ever enough. Continue reading
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“You probably build your way out”
📓 May 13, 2026 — 9:05 a.m. Head resting back in the chair. Eyes closed. Tired. Simba threw up around 1:30 in the morning. I ended up driving around late at night. Went to Starbucks. Came home around 4:30 a.m. Just trying to relieve stress. I guess everybody has their way of doing that. That was… Continue reading
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“Love doesn’t get to take my peace anymore”
📓 Monday, May 11, 2026 — 9:07 p.m. I’m sitting here watching the Lakers about to get eliminated by OKC. Possibly LeBron’s last game as a Laker. Beat It by Michael Jackson playing in my ears. ⸻ Today was long. Yesterday too. Mother’s Day. ⸻ My mom wanted us to go eat breakfast together at… Continue reading
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Enjoy the ride while it’s happening”
📓 May 12, 2026 — 7:54 a.m. A couple days after Mother’s Day. I’m thinking about taking my mom to get a massage later. She’s always stressed. Simba’s in the window. Outside light is just white this morning. Perfect road trip? Honestly… I think it’s simple. Pick a place. Drive there with someone you care about.… Continue reading
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“Maybe progress is strength too”
📓 May 11, 2026 — 6:50 a.m. Simba sitting at his window. Eyes closed in the same stupid chair I always sit in. Laptop on the ottoman. The question is: What made you realize you were stronger than you thought? And honestly… I don’t think I’ve ever looked at myself that way. I’ve never sat there… Continue reading
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Sometimes blankets get wet
I used to think more thinking would solve everything. But sometimes life gets messy, blankets get wet, and you just deal with what happens next. Continue reading
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It’s not sucking. It’s data.
📓 May 8, 2026 — 7:37 a.m. A little more rested today. I tried taking most of yesterday off from selling paper and plastic bags. Honestly… it helped. I’ve never stayed motivated very long when learning something new. I’m impatient. And I hate sucking at things. Hate it. That’s part of why I procrastinated for… Continue reading
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“My workout doesn’t look like a workout”
30 seconds at a time. 3:06 p.m. Busy day. Vet visit. Deliveries. My fitness routine isn’t really traditional. I deliver paper and plastic bags every day. That means lifting cases constantly. 10 pounds.20 pounds.30 pounds. One drop after another. So even when I’m not “working out”… I kind of am. Then when I have time…… Continue reading