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“I stopped today… and it felt strange”
Follow me on IG: @punisherpapi 📓 Sunday, March 29, 2026 — 3:56 p.m. I’m sitting in my van in front of a Target, under the shade. Not moving. Not rushing. That’s not normal for me. I’m tired. My eyes feel warm. Sleep’s been off this week. Sometimes it feels like the thoughts hit me in my… Continue reading
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“I shrank to fit in”
I went to a Catholic all-boys high school. Built on top of a cemetery. Right next to Dodger Stadium. So yeah… right off the bat, that felt like a setup. But what I really learned there had nothing to do with ghosts. It was me. I was afraid. Afraid of school dances. Afraid of public… Continue reading
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“I stopped believing everything I think”
“You see this cat? I love it more than I love you. Goodbye.” That’s what she told me when she left. For someone else. A man with a wife and kids. At that time, I was already in debt. Student loans. Credit cards. Trying to fix my life by going back to school after failing… Continue reading
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“Better. Not Perfect.”
Follow me on X: @punisherpapi · IG: https://www.instagram.com/punisherpapi?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ%3D%3D&utm_source=qr 📓 Sunday, March 1, 2026 — 7:11 p.m. Forgetting how you used to be. But never disrespect yourself for that version you once thought was “bad.” It was just a version learning in the dark. 2019. CSULB. Sitting in the waiting room for my first session with the school psychologist.… Continue reading
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“Cuando dejo de pensar… algo real aparece”
A veces pensar demasiado no ayuda. A veces solo hay que dejar que la mano se mueva y ver qué aparece. Continue reading
2 responses to ““Cuando dejo de pensar… algo real aparece””
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Super ! No lo pensé lo sentí de decirteLo !!!
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Gracias
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“The most fun exercise isn’t physical”
This year I went to watch Project Hail Mary with Ryan Gosling. At first it felt long. Then it didn’t. Then it got sentimental. Then it made me think. That stayed with me. This morning, I’m drinking my coffee, watching a podcast, and that question comes up— What’s the most fun way to exercise? And I started… Continue reading
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“I used to hate reading… until this book”
I used to hate reading. 7th grade. 8th grade. Still hated it in high school. And now? Now I don’t even have time to read— but I’m trying to make time for it. Funny how that works. But back then, there was one book. I heard it was Stephen King’s favorite. I didn’t read Stephen… Continue reading
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“What My Cat Taught Me About Self-Judgment”
Follow me on X: @punisherpapi · IG: @punisherpapi 📓 Wednesday, February 25, 2026 — 10:01 p.m.Failure has haunted me. It’s been the answer to a question I never asked. Today I took my cat to the veterinarian. He has dealt with feline herpes, and I made the decision to take him off his medication. He seemed fine to… Continue reading
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“If life’s going to hit me… I’m swinging back”
I’m sitting here drinking my coffee. Blue chair. Laptop in front of me. My blue futon next to me—with a ripped shirt thrown over it because my orange furball likes to claim it as his spot. Morning light coming in. Just sitting here. Thinking. I don’t read much. But if I had to pick— I’d… Continue reading
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🎬 Street Cinema: Nobody — the everyday John Wick
A quiet life. A routine that never ends. And the moment when something inside you refuses to stay buried. Continue reading
